August 3rd was a day that I had been dreading for a long, long time.
It was my husband and I’s “should have been” due date, and I was an emotional mess leading up to it. Scott was scheduled off from work, so we planned to not have any plans and to see how we felt as the day unfolded. After spending the morning in our pajamas, we decided to get out and treat ourselves to lunch and a movie, followed by a walk through the park with ice cream.
Everyone deals with the loss of a miscarriage differently, and there isn’t a right or wrong way to grieve or time to move on. Journaling and sharing our journey has helped me personally, so I felt compelled to share an update of where we are six months later.
Dealing with a “should have been” due date is really hard. Like unimaginably hard. It’s not something that I was ever prepared to deal with, and I don’t wish the pain, both physically and mentally, on anyone reading this.
It probably sounds crazy or overdramatic to some, but to me, this date will stand out similarly to the birthday of a deceased family member or loved one. And, in some ways, it’s almost worse.
Instead of thinking back to all of the memories I shared with them, I can’t help but to wonder what our baby would have been like. What did he or she look like? What kind of person would they have grown up to be? Would they have been mellow and observant like me or outspoken and adventurous like Scott?
Most of all, I can’t help but to wonder the same question every single day …
What would my life be like right now if our baby was here with us today?
The “what if”s are constant.
We are strong in our faith and know that God has a plan for us. We know that bringing our baby into our lives and then whisking him or her away into His arms instead of ours is also a part of that plan. We don’t know why it happened, and we probably never will, so all we can do is trust that there is a plan for us, and that our family will grow when it’s supposed to.
That said, living day-to-day like nothing happened is probably the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do. Besides actually going through the miscarriage, the D&C, and the recovery, moving on to a new definition of life afterwards often feels like my own version of The Twilight Zone.
To those of you who are newer to the blog, I’ve always been open about the struggles that Scott and I have been through, all of which have happened in the five years that we have been married. Of course there are things about our lives that I wish could change, but please don’t think that I don’t feel extremely grateful for where we are and how much we have overcome, either. This post explains most of our journey, and it was published three months before we got pregnant.
In a nutshell, we had our lives completely figured out. Then life happened. Scott losing his job (twice) literally uprooted our entire lives and plans. There are still some days where my mind wanders off into “what if” that never happened, too. But, that’s another post for another time.
Due to everything that has happened and craving a fresh start, we decided to take a leap of faith and move to Brooklyn just four months ago. We live in a beautiful apartment in one of the most desired neighborhoods in New York City, but there are still days where I blink and forget how we even got here.
What is this life that I’m living right now?
I currently spend my days applying and interviewing for jobs all over the city. It takes more motivation to blog than ever before, and I have lost a lot of drive for things I used to love creating and sharing in this space like new recipes and beauty tutorials. In a sense, I feel like that creative side of me is on vacation somewhere, and I can only hope that it will return soon.
I am so thankful for my love for fitness. With so many things out of my control, lacing up my sneakers and getting a good sweat through a workout or run is something I can. It feels amazing. Since we are still trying, I’m not planning on training for a long distance race or pushing myself to extreme physical limits these days, but I do what feels good for me, and that makes me happy.
I feel very grateful to be living blocks away from the biggest park in Brooklyn, and I spend a lot of time there. Sometimes I’ll go for a run, but most times I just go to walk. I walk with Roadie for hours and often sit under a tree and enjoy the fresh air while listening to a podcast.
Lately, I’ve been turning to the Daily Audio Bible, and when I’m feeling down about losing the baby, I listen to some kind of TTC support series. Beat Infertility has a lot of great episodes on staying sane during the process, and I enjoyed this one when I took an extra long walk on August 3rd.
I have a feeling that things will change when my days get busier, but I’m going to keep it real and say that life isn’t all rainbows and sunshine these days. I miss my friends back home, I miss my family, and most of all, I miss a normal sense of what life is, or was. I am enjoying living in New York, but I guess I just crave a bit of normalcy.
It’s easy to spiral down the path of picturing what I would be doing if my job was to take care of a newborn day in and day out, so I keep reminding myself to focus on the present. It’s important to take everything one day at a time and enjoy what is happening right now in front of me.
The hardest pill to swallow right now is pursuing a life outside of working from home (which I’ve always planned on doing once we decided to start our family) and into a new direction in what could be a new career. I’ve been interviewing for jobs in social media and marketing since we moved here, but I’ve also been looking for full-time work in the fitness industry. I’ve had a lot of interest there, and I’m looking forward to getting an answer regarding a position that I’ve had five interviews with over the past few weeks. (Yes, five with the same company. This is real life, my friends.)
I’m in a spot where I feel very conflicted. Anyone who has visited the Park Slope area knows that it’s a place that is popular for couples to move to once they want to “settle down” and start a family in New York City. It seems like everyone here has a baby carrier, a stroller, a dog, a nanny, and sometimes all of the above.
It feels nice to be living in such a family-friendly area, but it’s also a constant reminder of what my life isn’t right now.
I have good days where I wake up and feel like attacking the day, and I have bad days where I don’t want to get out of bed at all. What I’ve realized after listening to podcasts, reading support forums, and on my own over the past six months is that this is normal.
It’s okay to have good days and bad days. It’s okay to have meltdowns. It’s okay if you want to disappear for a day if you don’t feel like sharing your life on the Internet or answering a phone call from a friend who wants to catch up. Your true friends will understand and (hopefully) be there when you feel more up to talking.
I have to admit that my pregnancy envy is at an all-time high. I’m not exaggerating when I say that I have had an obviously pregnant person stand right next to me in the last three barre classes I’ve taken (all at different studios). It’s hard not to feel like happy, healthy pregnancies are everywhere.
It’s been rough seeing pregnancy and birth announcements taking over my news feeds. As happy as I am for the couples experiencing the joy of bringing a new baby into their family, it always stops me in my tracks and makes me want to quickly scroll past it. Honestly, it sucks.
So, here’s what I do …
If there’s one thing that I’ve learned since our “should have been” due date, it’s that the world didn’t stop just because our baby didn’t arrive. My friends and friends of friends are going to continue to get pregnant (some more easily than others) and go on to live and share their lives. Of course, I congratulate them, but I don’t go out of my way to ask how things are going or to hear details of their pregnancy or about the days as a mom to a newborn.
As a friend, I feel bad because I want to be there for them during this new and exciting journey into parenthood! It’s obvious that some of my friends don’t know how to handle my struggles, either. It’s such an awkward position to be in, but I know that we’ll be able to resume normal conversations again down the road. I can only hope that they understand where I am coming from, and that they will be there as a friend when I’m ready to talk on a regular basis again.
When it comes to infertility, I can either accept it or dwell on it, and I’m doing my best to accept it. I am focusing on what our future looks like, and right now, that involves me getting a full-time job and seeing where the next year takes me. I am looking forward to new opportunities, and I plan to keep new content rolling out on the blog as much as I can.
Please don’t read this post for what it’s not. The purpose of sharing this update is not to gain sympathy or complain about a life that I yearn to have. I felt an urge to write out my thoughts and share them with you. Doing so helps me process what I’m going through, and I hope that it provides some insight as well as a virtual hug to those of you going through a similar struggle.
To answer a few questions that I often receive:
Yes, we are still trying. We are coming close to the two-year mark, and now that we are settled in to our new home, we plan on researching doctors and infertility specialists in the area to help guide us through our TTC journey. (Brooklyn/NYC residents: Any suggestions?) I have been using a Baby-Comp to chart my temperatures and ovulation patterns over the past few months, and I’m trying to ignore the surprises that my body has been throwing at me lately like symptoms of pregnancy and week-late periods. (Go body.)
Instead of obsessing over every little detail, I’m just trying to let go, let life happen, and let nature do it’s thing. Here’s hoping!
To anyone struggling with fertility issues or your own journey to conceive, you are anything but alone. Thank you for reading this post and also for your continuous support on this blog. <3
![[in our elementary school era] 🚌😭
Skyler did great walking into KINDERGARTEN with a big smile on his face this morning. I, however, was a bit of a mess on our walk home. 🥹
It’s wild how fast these 5 years with him have gone … 7 since we moved to NYC and into our apartment, dreaming of the day our kids would someday go to the *awesome* school right down our block. 🏫
That day is today, and I still don’t believe it — feeling allll of the emotions and thanking God for placing us here and for being able to trust His timing through the journey. 🫶🏼 #hbshinnyc
SO proud of you, SK - you are going to rock your first year at your “big boy school” - WE LOVE YOU !! 🩵👑](https://lifeinleggings.com/wp-content/plugins/instagram-feed/img/placeholder.png)
Sending so much love your way! <3
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Thank you, Erin <3
Heather, I wish I had words of wisdom for you. All I know is that life can sometimes be so unimaginably difficult. I try to remember that God won’t put anything on my plate that I can’t handle. Some times I may struggle through the days (weeks, months) but I know I’ll come out stronger (I hope).
Much love to you and Scott. I admire you’re brave enough to share your struggles so openly on your blog.
While I don’t have pregnancy envy (right now), I really do wonder if I’ll meet someone and be married again. I’m okay(ish) if I don’t, but it’s hard not to take the lack of dating action personally.
xo
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Hi Ange! Yes, it can. You’re absolutely right and I agree that you aren’t dealt more than you can handle. What doesn’t kill us certainly makes us stronger! Thank you for reading and commenting. And don’t take a lack of anything personally. Something will happen, if it’s supposed to, when it’s supposed to. <3 Stay strong!
I don’t know you in real life but I’ve been reading this blog for a few years and FWIW, when it eventually happens for you guys, I think you’re going to be an amazing mom. I can’t imagine having a parent who was that strong, and thoughtful and handles tragedy the way you have. Sending good thoughts and prayers your way.
Aw, thank you so much for reading and for the encouragement, Zooey! (I love your name, btw. It’s close to the top of the list for a future baby girl) 😉 I appreciate the prayers!
Just wanted to leave a quick note and let you know I’m always thinking of you and sending so much love your way. I’m so sorry for everything you’ve been through, and can’t imagine how it feels, but I have a good feeling about NYC. I hope it’s an amazing turning point for you guys. Let me know if you need anything! Dr Flynn is in Wisconsin but does distance work. He’s pretty amazing.
Let’s stand in the Hamilton line SOON 🙂
xoxo
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Hi friend! Thank you so much for all of your support and kind words. <3 I have a good feeling about NYC, too. I'm looking forward to seeing what the next year brings! Thanks for the recommendation, and YES to anytime you want to wait a million hours for Hamilton 😉
I won’t pretend like I know what you’re going through or can relate at all, but sending love your way <3. I think it's pretty amazing that you use your social media platform to be so honest + relatable. Best wishes!
Thank you, Lauren. You know, it’s not always easy, but it just doesn’t feel genuine to skip over things that have a huge impact on my everyday life. I appreciate your support!
Heather, Thank you for this heartfelt and honest post. I am keeping you in my thoughts and prayers. — I haven’t personally visited this office, but I’ve heard great things about this practice in NYC. I met Christina through a coaching program that I went through. It has wonderful Yelp reviews too. — http://naturnalife.com/womens-health-fertility/ and https://www.yelp.com/biz/naturna-institute-new-york-4
Thank you for the prayers. <3 And I appreciate the recommendation!
I’m so sorry for your struggles. Have you heard of NaPro? I have heard a lot of good things about it though no personal experience. God bless you and your husband.
http://www.naprotechnology.com
To find a NaPro doctor: http://www.fertilitycare.org
I haven’t! I’ll have to check it out – thank you for sharing 🙂
Thank you so much for writing this. I am have been going through infertility struggles (13 months now) and it is really difficult. And I know that the road ahead may be long and difficult. This is really so comforting to read to know that I’m not alone. Thank you for sharing.
Best wishes to you <3
Hi Kelly. Sending many hugs and prayers to you. Infertility is tough, but it’s a touch easier with support and knowing that you’re not in this alone. Stay strong! <3
Sharing these thoughts is so brave, I appreciate your courage to put yourself out there to help others going through similar struggles as well as those who want to know more about how to empathize for friends and family struggling.
Have you heard of Jess Lively or listened to any of her podcasts? She doesn’t cover the topic of infertility, but her work is very much about embracing the now, going with flow and accepting what is. I’ve found her interviews and even her recent life changes, that on the surface make her life look nothing like mine, be rooted in deep life lessons that are surprisingly applicable to many parts of my life. I’d encourage you to try out her podcast on a walk!
Best wishes for you in this difficult period, may tomorrow feel a little lighter 🙂
I actually haven’t. I’ll have to check her out. Thank you for sending over the suggestion and for the support!
3 years later and I still think about the baby that I miscarried. I have had a baby since, and that took a long time between trying, getting diagnosed, and getting pregnant. I haven’t really blogged since having my daughter, I think after all the struggle, I don’t know how to be that persona anymore
I don’t have any recommendations in the NY area but loved my fertility clinic in Boston. The advice I can give is to be your own advocate. My OB refused to refer me to a specialist, I ended up having to have my PCP do it. I wish you the best of luck, sending many prayers and love your way. If you ever need to chat, I’m here.
I can completely understand why you wouldn’t want to keep you normal blog schedule up. Once I start working full-time, it will be something I will really struggle to focus on keeping up. I love it, but I just don’t feel like the same person I once was. I guess it’s all just a part of the process. Congrats on your expanding family – that is amazing news! <3
Thank you so much for the support!
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Thanks so much for sharing your story, Heather. I know my mom has been through this, and I so wouldn’t wish it on anyone. I obviously don’t have any words of wisdom, but I do think you’re brave, you’re helping people, and good things will happen for you and Scott. Thinking of you.
Thank you so much, Ellen. <3
Oh man….Your thoughts are so real and honest I just love that I’ve been able to follow your blog for so long. First of all, Riley and I have no ambitions for children, so I have to say that relating to you directly doesn’t always happen. That being said, my heart breaks for you and Scott because I know how much having a child has meant to you and the fact that you’ve made it through this year with so much strength and courage is something you should be super proud of. Life doesn’t always happen in the order we want it to, but I truly believe your prayers will be answered soon. Keep staying strong and hopeful and I know things will always work out for the best.
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Thanks so much, Kelly. I really appreciate your readership and all of your support! You are so sweet. <3
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I’m so sorry for everything you’ve been through Heather. And I totally respect how openly you’ve shared what you’ve been through on your blog. I have definitely had rough times and it definitely resonated with me how you said some days you feel you can take on the world and others you just want to stay in bed. Who knows why things happen, but sending love your way and so happy you and Scott are discovering the best of NYC. Xo.
Thank you so much, Lauren. I appreciate the support! Just like working out, sometimes you have to listen to your body and do what feels good. Mental break days are okay!
Heather,
I have been following your journey since I discovered your blog a few years ago, and I admire you for sharing all of this. I blogged about our missed miscarriage, but it was more just journaling and documenting my emotions and struggles and what went on to be infertility (the baby stopped growing at 12 weeks, but we didn’t find out until 2 weeks later at a routine ultrasound). I can completely relate to this. My due date was March 12, and it’s a date that I’ll never forget. My husband suddenly deployed during the midst of our TTC journey and it was probably the lowest point in my life- still so emotionally torn up from what had happened and how we weren’t getting pregnant again while everyone around us seemed to be so easily, and living across the country from my family and friends alone in a very different city. I won’t say that it’ll happen when the time is right or keep your chin up- those things don’t really help the matter when said. But be your own advocate. I don’t know if you guys have undiagnosed infertility or have some answers, but demand every test possible be dome (HSG, saline sonogram, 7 day post ovulation progesterone levels, FSH, LH, and AMH levels, thyroid, ultrasounds, etc.). We finally got to the root of our problem after I did enough pestering. Have you tried Pregnitude? I swear, that regulated my periods and boosted my progesterone levels! I’ll be praying for you guys….
Hi Kim! Thank you so much for reading. I’m really sorry to hear about your loss, I’m sure that was heartbreaking. Also, I’m sure that having your husband deployed is pretty tough. You are so strong! Thank you for the advice, I plan on testing as much as we can sooner than later. I haven’t tried Pregnitude. I’ll have to do some research! Thanks for sharing and best of luck to you <3
Sending you and Scott so much love. Thank you for sharing this. I can’t imagine going through this mentally, and I hope that we won’t have to do so. But then, I hope that we have the chance. I hope that makes sense (that we can run the risk of having a miscarriage by getting pregnant). I truly hope that doesn’t sound callous. I have been thinking about you a lot–I hope that you and Scott have some good news soon.
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Thanks, Susie. I think of you and your struggles, too. I used to think that way when I read about miscarriages before I experienced it for myself. I guess the good news is that we CAN get pregnant, so there is a silver lining. Thank you for your support and for reading. Prayers to you! <3
Thinking of you, Heather. I wish I could offer you words that would help heal, all I can think to say is hold on to your faith. I am hoping you have good news soon. <3
Thank you Leslee, I appreciate the support!
I recently found your blog but have never commented. Thank you for sharing such a personal side of your life. And i am SO sorry you went through something to painful. There is no right way to grieve…AMEN! I had a miscarriage months after losing my almost 2 year old to cancer therefore I had a difference perspective on miscarriage — because I had just dealt with the death of my son who battled cancer for a year. People judged me for not being sadder about the miscarriage and I felt like a bad mom and bad person. Everyone copes differently and no one should be judged if they are “too sad” in your eyes or “not sad enough”. Again thank you for sharing, and keep your head up 🙂
Hi Jessica, thank you for following and commenting! I’m so sorry to hear about your losses … I can’t even imagine what that feels like. You are one strong mama. The last thing you should feel is judged, as everyone deals with situations like these differently. You have been through so much, and you are amazing. Don’t let anyone make you think differently!
I stumbled upon your blog a while ago and I am having similar infertility issues. I heard a story yesterday that helped me put things in perspective. Its a Taoist story of an old farmer who had worked his crops for many years. One day his horse ran away. Upon hearing the news, his neighbors came to visit. “Such bad luck,” they said sympathetically. “Maybe,” the farmer replied. The next morning the horse returned, bringing with it three other wild horses. “How wonderful,” the neighbors exclaimed. “Maybe,” replied the old man. The following day, his son tried to ride one of the untamed horses, was thrown, and broke his leg. The neighbors again came to offer their sympathy on his misfortune. “Maybe,” answered the farmer. The day after, military officials came to the village to draft young men into the army. Seeing that the son’s leg was broken, they passed him by. The neighbors congratulated the farmer on how well things had turned out. “Maybe,” said the farmer.
Perhaps everything happens for a reason. I wish you the best in dealing with the daily struggles that come along with this sometimes heart wrenching journey. Hopefully when we look back on these days, we will see that something good came out of them–be it a baby or a new perspective on life.
Hi Alexandra, thanks for reading! Thank you for sharing that story – it definitely makes you think about why things happen, when the do. It’s not always a coincidence, and I firmly believe that it’s a part of our perfect plan. What doesn’t kill us makes us stronger, right?
My first husband and I tried everything to get pregnant – AI, IVF, accupuncture, etc. but to no avail (the issues were all mine). About a year later we were divorced (not bc of anything related to the infertility). Two years later I met my now husband, and I was pregnant 6 weeks after our wedding. All that to say – it is 100% God’s timing!! You are a good and faithful servant, and He will provide when it is right for you. Your strength is amazing! Much love to you and Scott.
Wow – congrats on your pregnancy Lindsay! That’s awesome to hear. Sometimes things just work out. It sounds like God’s timing was perfect for you. Thank you for your support! <3
Hugs to you as you figure out this trying time in your life. I can relate to you on the multiple interviews with the same company as I just went through four interviews and didn’t get the job offer. So frustrating! Hopefully you get the position and it will start an upward trend of good luck in your life. Hang in there, Heather!
That is so frustrating. Job hunting, applying, and interviewing really is a full-time job … and then some. I really appreciate your support! And, best of luck to you on your job search!
While my infertility doctor is not in NYC, it would be a quick trip… I CANNOT recommend University Reproductive Associates of Hasbrouck Heights, specifically Dr. Adam Fechner, enough. URA has locations in Hasbrouck Heights, Hoboken and Wayne – all in New Jersey. I’m an IVF warrior. Luckily, my second transfer (a frozen embryo transfer) was successful – I’m now 32 weeks pregnant with a son! I will also say the Instagram TTC community is a beautiful thing. I have “met” and now text/call daily with some of the amazing women that are going through a very similar thing. If you have ANY questions, I’d be happy to answer them (shoot me an email). Much love (and baby dust!) to you and Scott – I’m rooting for you.
Hi Jessica, thank you so much for sharing! Congrats on your pregnancy – that is so awesome to hear! I should definitely get more involved on the TTC community forums. It’s refreshing to hear other people’s journeys and stories. I really appreciate your comment, and I’ll keep your recommendations handy 😉
Thinking of you, I can’t imagine how hard that must have been.
Thank you Kara. <3
Beautiful post and thank you for sharing 🙂 Wishing you and Scott all the best.
Thanks Lesley! I appreciate you!
“I have good days where I wake up and feel like attacking the day, and I have bad days where I don’t want to get out of bed at all. What I’ve realized after listening to podcasts, reading support forums, and on my own over the past six months is that this is normal. It’s okay to have good days and bad days. It’s okay to have meltdowns.”
Can I just tell you how much I needed to hear that right now? While I’m not TTC, I’ve been going through health problems (mono, and on top of my regular IBS, painful periods) for several months and these words are just so reassuring to me. There are some days where I just need to sit in bed and cry, and you know what? Allowing yourself to feel that way helps so much.
Thank you for sharing this with us…I’m sure it isn’t easy. This piled on top of your move must make you feel like your world has been turned upside down. But you’re right, there is a plan, and you just have to trust in that 🙂
I’m so glad that helped you. I have to remind myself that it’s okay to just live and deal with life as it comes all the time. It’s easy to put too much pressure on ourselves to be perfect or ignore when we need to grieve or just be sad for a day. Of course, the plan is to snap out of it! Just remember it’s okay to have “a day” for you here and there. 😉
Thank you for this beautiful, heart-wrenching post, Heather. Sending you so many hugs and wishes for brighter days. XOXO
Aw, thanks Alyse. I love following your new mama journey! xo
Heather, posts like this are so important, I think. There are so many couples who experience the same struggles and they may be too afraid or too sad to even talk about it. But you offering your story publicly is so helpful to others with the same struggle. And like you said, it is so important for your own healing as well. If writing about it is helping you cope, then you keep writing about it. I am sending so many healing thoughts and prayers for you!
Shelbee
http://www.shelbeeontheedge.com
<3 <3 <3
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I’ve been there…twice. It becomes less of an obsession, but never easier when I think back on those babies that should be here with us. I hope you find peace soon and your miracle baby finds their way to you very soon. Xo
Hi Heather, i have been a long time reader and am so thankful to hear your story. It is refreshing to See that I am not alone in this battle.
While I talk openly openly about our miscarriage I don’t have a forum to find others to relate to. My due date passed in May and we have yet to conceive again. The deep desire to become a momma is so hard and it’s nice to hear that there are other woman that struggle with the same thoughts. Good luck to you and your hubby!
Hi Michele. I’m so sorry to hear about your loss, and I really appreciate your readership. As hard as it is to go through this struggle, it is comforting to know that we aren’t alone. There are a lot of forums and threads online that I enjoy reading to help in that department. I often find them through pregnancy tracking apps on my phone. (I currently use Glow and Fertility Friend.) The podcasts have really been helpful and have definitely kept me sane on days I feel like I might lose it! Wishing all the best to you. <3
The way you are so vulnerable to opening yourself up and sharing the grief and sorrow and what you are learning really overwhelms me with such amazement. <3 I'm going to be praying for you more Heather, cause I don't know exactly what it's like, but i know that loss is so hard, and I know that God will work this for good, even through the sorrow.
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Thank you so much, Emily. I really appreciate the prayers and support!
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Hi there, first time commenter but longtime reader..I’m new to the Manhattan area and trying to start a family too (I have been for a year and a half). I’ve been seeing Dr. David Reichman at Cornell in TriBeCa and can’t say enough about how warm he is and how lovely his office/the experience has been. Good luck with everything and hopefully you can find a doctor that’s a good fit and makes you feel supported.
Hi Katie, thank you for reading and commenting! Best of luck to you and your husband. Thank for the suggestion! <3
Hi, Heather,
I just wanted to let you know that you and Scott are in my prayers daily, as are all those who struggle with infertility and miscarriage. Thank you for sharing your journey. You are such a strong and beautiful person, inside and out.
<3 Stephanie
Aw, thank you so much, Stephanie. <3 I really appreciate the prayers and support!
I just found your blog while googling if its normal to not want to get out of bed in the morning post miscarriage…I just wanted to say thank you for sharing your story. And I am so sorry for your loss. My should of been due date is coming up October 9th and lately I can’t keep it together. I swear everyone I know right now is pregnant, especially at church and one gal has a due date two days after mine. I can’t help but cry when I see her and think God chose to care for her little one while taking away mine. I have one beautiful daughter who is 3 but she was born at 29 weeks and I feel as though this miscarriage has been the icing on the cake to a terrible unfolding of events in our marriage and journey to the family we always dreamed of. Anyway, I will be praying for you.
Hi Caitlin, I’m glad you found the blog, and I’m so sorry to hear about your loss. Just know that it’s okay not to keep it together from time to time, or even have the desire to do so. I can completely relate to that. There are days that pass by where I literally just want to stay in bed all day, and if it’s a day where I don’t necessarily have to be anywhere, I take cues from my body and rest. I turn on a feel-good movie or binge-watch one of my favorite shows. Guilty pleasures help. Maybe yours is to totally unplug and read a book? Find whatever makes you happy and indulge in that activity. I had a few friends and even a client that was due around the same time as me. It’s really hard to see their baby pictures, and some days are easier than others with that, too. The best advice I can give you is to keep your chin up and pray for peace, understanding, and healing. I will be praying for you and your husband, as this is an extremely trying situation. Many hugs to you! <3 <3 <3
Creative article – I am thankful for the analysis – Does someone know if my assistant can find a blank OH AFP Early Pregnancy Loss Form example to complete ?